1.09AM

As he waited on his phone to power up, he thought about what to write. Whether or not, he should even right. Whether it would matter anyways. As he lay in the couch, the air silent, the world asleep and the only sound was that of a silent hum as the fan moved above his head, he wondered if a roof was all he had now. Nothing more but just a roof. A roof under which he slowly faded away, held back by himself and  the circumstances that placed him there. He had never felt such brokenness before, just loneliness, such confused emotions. He thought perhaps it would go away if he slept. Yet under that roof that was all he had, sleep was not a comfort tonight.

What made him so sad and lonely? Was it the lack of money to purchase fleeting moments of happiness? Was it the lack of people he called friends who only cared when they needed him? People who read every scream of his and tuned out when it wasn't the right enough frequency for them? Was it the subconscious burden of carrying the weight of his family dawning ever so close? Was it the lack of someone to share his dying humanity with? Perhaps it was just his lack of social skills and belief in himself that was his doom.

His heart was ever so heavy as the words kept pouring out of him, like a broken faucet. Nothing could hold him back and still he pressed his hands down on the faucet, hoping to quell the rush. Nothing could understand how much sorrow he wallowed in. Nothing could stand in the way of slowing fading away. Yet he pushed it all to the back and smiled. After all, ones life isn't for one alone. One's life is for their family, their friends, the society, the entire race. One must be brave and feign courage regardless of how much one was weary and broken. One must preserve and find their own spots of joy even in a bleak and dark place. As he lay on the couch, slowing wondering whether he should share any of this with the world, he remembers that no one really cares, so why not.

Why not let the emotions roar without holding them back? Why not breakdown and let the world see your unrivaled misery? Why not just be unhappy and find peace in that. Why not? Because the world just doesn't care. Everyone has their own burden and they can't and won't carry yours. So as he lay on the couch, wishing with all his might that he could at least st cry and ease his burden, he knew that would never happen and he would have to go the next day, still carrying his weight on his soul.